"Being weak is being strong."
I am currently on vacation and waiting for my visa. Waiting is killing me. Why? Because all those negative thoughts keep bugging me, now that I have more time to live slowly and think. Looking back to the path I took, I dump my experience on my first job to venture on a new career. I am happy but when my mood is on the blue spectrum, I kept thinking "Is it worth it?", "My past classmates are now up on the career ladder, what did I just risked!", "I should have been this and that, if I just haven't".
Last time, I was able to chat with my friend and she shared that she's like having a quarter life crisis, thinking about what she really wants to do. It was funny, because in social medias, you can only see happy faces, events, and successes. As you scroll down the timeline, deep inside, it affects you, evaluating yourself why you are not like them, always. But it's just a facade, beneath those happy faces, are lonely experiences and beneath the successes, are underlying failures and perseverance. What we see are just end results.
Being on her shoes once, I shared my experience when I was on the same boat - evaluating my life, my passion, the what ifs. And I come to realize that if I climbed straight to the success ladder, I wouldn't have been able to empathize with her, to share my thoughts, my experience. Sometimes we think that we should keep our weaknesses deep inside us, to show the world that we are a boulder - strong and firm. If we are weak, then we cannot inspire, we cannot be a model. But what I felt was the opposite, being weak has made me strong, being weak allows me to keep my feet on the ground and feel more connected with others. With this feeling, I didn't just helped someone, but I also gained help. I felt stronger because I know I am not alone and I didn't have to mask the loneliness or weaknesses deep inside me.
